#AskDanielTrust is a weekly column and vlog where Daniel Trust, an award-winning social entrepreneur, motivational speaker and youth advocate, answers questions and gives advice to young people from around the world. Do you have a question for Daniel Trust? If so, please connect and send him a message on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter or Linkedin.
In this week’s #AskDanielTrust, Christine says: Daniel, from what I’ve read and the videos that I’ve watched about you, you have experienced a lot of pain and trauma. How have you been able to overcome and make peace with all the bad things that have happened to you?
Christine, this is a great question. Yes, it's true that I’ve experienced a lot of pain and trauma in my life. However, I’ve learned how to make peace with all the bad things that have happened to me and that has helped me move on with my life and look forward to a bright future.
In this column and vlog, I am going to share 3 actions you can take to help you make peace with your past and overcome the pain and trauma you’ve experienced.
1. Forgive everyone who has hurt you
The first action you should take when you want to make peace with your past and overcome the pain and trauma you’ve experienced is to forgive those who have hurt you.
I truly believe when we forgive those who have hurt us, it allows us to make peace with the trauma they caused us and this gives us the opportunity to move forward with our lives.
From experience, I know that it’s very hard to forgive someone who has done you wrong. But, if you want to have a peaceful life, you need to learn how to forgive and let go of the past.
One of the reasons why I have been able to live my best life is because I’ve chosen to forgive everyone who has hurt me, including the people who killed my parents and sisters during the Rwandan genocide and all the family members who abused me when I was young.
If you want to overcome the pain and trauma you’ve experienced in your life, forgive those who caused it and move on with your life. That is what I have done and it has helped me a lot.
2. Forgive yourself when you hurt someone
The second action you should take when you want to make peace with your past and overcome the pain and trauma you’ve experienced is to forgive yourself when you hurt someone.
When we think about forgiveness we always think that it’s about forgiving those who have hurt us, but we need to understand that sometimes we also do the hurting to other people.
If you are aware and acknowledge that you have caused pain and trauma in someone’s life, you should forgive yourself for doing that. If it’s appropriate, you should reach out to the person you’ve hurt and ask for their forgiveness. Doing this allows you to move on peacefully.
The reality is, we all make mistakes because we are human and sometimes we hurt other people. For me, I have had to forgive myself on multiple occasions when I’ve hurt others.
It's not always easy to acknowledge that you've hurt someone, but when you take responsibility for your actions, it helps you grow as a person.
If you’ve caused pain and trauma to someone, you should forgive yourself as this will allow you to make peace with what happened and you will be able to look forward to a bright future.
3. Have faith and hope for a bright future
Once you have forgiven those who have hurt you or you have forgiven yourself for hurting someone, you should have faith and hope for a bright future.
When you forgive those who have hurt you, you don’t have to remain friends with them if being friends with them will remind you of the pain and trauma they caused you.
You also don’t have to remain friends with those you’ve hurt after you have forgiven yourself and they have decided to forgive you for the pain and trauma you caused them.
We all have different ways in which we handle relationships after being hurt or hurting someone. The key here is to learn from the bad experiences we’ve had and the bad choices that we’ve made and move on with our lives by becoming better human beings.
Having faith and hope for a bright future will definitely help you make peace with your past and overcome the pain and trauma you’ve experienced in your life.
The above actions will help you overcome trauma
Christine, I hope my answer to your question was helpful to you and all the young people around the world who want to make peace with their past and overcome trauma.
Did you find this article and video helpful? If so, please share it on your social media or with a young person who can benefit from reading it.
Do you have any other advice you’d like to add to my advice? If so, please share it in the comments of this article or video. Thank you so much for reading and watching. Stay tuned to next week’s #AskDanielTrust Q&A.
Daniel Trust is President and CEO at Daniel Trust Foundation, an award-winning nonprofit organization that supports young people in the United States and Rwanda through various educational programs and digital campaigns. To support Daniel Trust Foundation's work, please sign up to become a monthly donor by visiting: www.DanielTrustFoundation.org.